While not exactly news, it is often worth repeating that which we all already know to remind ourselves that we are not, in fact, insane.

Mark Zuckerberg’s insistence on building his virtual reality project (or Metaverse as many uninformed spectators insist on calling it) and its utility to society borders on gaslighting. As someone who is actively taking short positions in Meta (or Facebook as I grudgingly call it), I find this hilarious.

What follows is a short list of reasons why this company is a dumpster fire and will continue to be one for quite some time.

Uninspired leadership

Tech leaders can get away with (or even benefit) from the perception that they are a bit eccentric and bossy. (Think Steve Jobs.) However, there is a serious weirdness factor associated with Mark Zuckerberg that seems to be more damaging than helpful. While CEOs don’t have to be adored by the public to be effective, it is apparent that Zuckerberg struggles to get buy-in for his projects, even from his own employees: a clear sign of weakness.

Taking credit for things that already exist

Referring to the ancient idea of a virtual reality platform using the buzzy term “metaverse” implied that something grand and novel was taking place, and this is a joke in and of itself. Many media outlets played along with this false narrative far too long. While virtual reality is a difficult technology, it has some utility for entertainment and gaming. However, if it had any utility beyond this (i.e., for businesses) the technology would have been improved upon and adopted by now, which it has not, and never will be. This leads me to the next point.

Meta is creating an expensive buggy offering for a nonexistent market

Mark Zuckerberg & Co have dumped billions of dollars to create something that nobody wanted and that no one asked for. Everyone knows that it’s already difficult to herd workers into Teams or Zoom meetings. The last thing we need is another distraction that keeps us from getting through our god-damned 23 minute PowerPoint presentation with our mics working! What sane company would increase its IT spend so that it could force its employees to hang out in a badly-conceived virtual world? This is a negative value proposition, and borders on fiscal malpractice.

Imagine the pandemonium of you and your coworkers dawning $1,500 headsets in order to plunge into a low-rent Pixar hellscape so that you could review your quarterly numbers. This is nothing more than the fever-dream of a madman!

I can’t even with these closing thoughts

There is no price point at which I would buy into Meta because I could get better value burning my cash to keep warm through the winter. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but if you bought into Meta near its 52 week highs, you’ve permanently destroyed half of your capital and you’ll be lucky to hold onto the other half through the end of 2023.

Meta might have been a decent investment if its bumbling leader had focused on its core businesses, but at this point, he’s too deep into the metaverse money-pit to turn back. Meta’s shareholders will suffer because of Zuckerberg’s need to save face and pretend he’s the next Steve Jobs.

If you’re holding Meta, good luck, and may God have mercy on your soul.

To anyone who is capable of reaching Mark Zuckerberg, I offer some advice from Gen Z: “Touch grass!”